Radiation recovery

As usual, I keep fooling myself into believing I'll dodge those grievous side-effects that I was warned about, just like I lucked out with my two rounds of chemo. But nope, radiation decided to break the rules.

For the first 15 sessions, I was practically breezing through – barely any changes. However, after crossing that checkpoint, it's like the side effects started to accelerate in a geometric progression. 

And now, even a whole 10 days after ringing the final treatment bell, my left side is casually shedding skin layers like an aging python. Pass the daily compresses, please!

Symbolism

Symbolism is everywhere... 

On my last day of radiation, George and I decided to get lunch as a celebration and finally try the Japanese restaurant on the final day of Boston restaurant week. We drove to Kenmore Square and ended up smack in the middle of a cancer walk with crowds of people dressed in pink going past the restaurant. The restaurant was full and we couldn't get in without the prior reservation weeks in advance (a sign to switch to healthy eating maybe).

All these people in pink made me think that it was some sort of fan club for the movie "Barbie" 😂 that I hear is quite popular, before I read the signs for breast cancer.

I thought it would be great and quite symbolic to get a picture of a breast cancer patient with the pink crowd. A few pictures and several hugs from random strangers -- I take it as a great sign from the universe that hopefully this experience is over and I can move on to better things...

Last day!

Today is my last day of radiation -- out of 30 in total! After the 15th day, the burns started to come out and I couldn't walk around without a cream soothing compress and ibuprofen... but I went on with life and made do and went back to the radiation rack daily.

Not sure if I am special (most cancer patients get about 15 radiations on average, I am told), but on my last day the hospital staff gave me a soap bubble shower spewing out of a hippo with musical accompaniment. I was even allowed to take a picture of the "torture chamber"! :)

So it is a huge relief on many levels: 

• First that it is over, in terms of cancer treatment regiment that was prescribed so far; 
• Secondly, now that the radiation is over and I can start to heal the burns (they should recover in two weeks they say) 
• Thirdly, I feel "born again" and can now plan my life beyond just the next week. I am thinking of picking up accordion playing if I manage to get one for less than $400, and organizing that fateful trip to Iceland that I was planning for my last birthday in the middle of chemo...

Radiation update

Well, I had my planned conversation with the doctors about when to stop my radiation treatment, and we finally agreed that I would stop at 24 treatments vs prescribed 30. And I was so planning to have my last treatment August 10th (coincidently my son's birthday) -- to have one big celebration party.

However, once I got home, my daughter went crazy, called the hospital and insisted that I finish up the entire length of the radiation treatment. She kept chanting "only six more", but then she would feel that I did EVERYTHING possible to deal with cancer. 

And resisting your child is so, so much harder than doctors --- so I am back in the hospital this week again, for my daily dose of radiation.

Medical fatigue

Couldn't find medical fatigue as a term, but after seven and a half months of treatments I can easily say that I am now at a state of medical fatigue. It is not the cancer per se or even the difficult treatments, it is the burn out of these never-ending hospitals, pills, appointments, fatigue, blood work, daily radiation, etc.

I am getting tired of being constantly exhausted.... though I think, I actually have it easier than most. I still manage to go to parties, birthdays, occasional concerts or even Cape Cod. I even managed to play a few volleyball games a week ago -- so I am more than half-way back to normal life, and it is still exhausting. 

People who have it harder than me, with harsher side-effects, or less of a support network -- I keep thinking, how do they do it? How do they stick it out and not flip the switch to stop all treatments and just do a life reset, at least for a while?

20 radiations

So, I finally have 20 radiations under my belt... and now my skin is burned, my muscles start to hurt, and my fatigue is back to the level of my chemo days. 

I was given numerous creams, pads, ibuprofen --- and the question is always there -- is it worth it? Why do I have to have 30 radiations, even though I had a complete response (no cancer cells were found after chemo and operation)? 

I ask: If I didn't get a complete response, how many sessions would be required? Still 30.

Per Dr. Google: By what percentage does radiation reduce recurrence of breast cancer?

"Radiation does not appear to prolong survival. Even though it does significantly decrease the chance of the tumor coming back, after 10 years it was only a 10 percent recurrence rate without radiation. With radiation, it would reduce the recurrence rate to about 2 percent."

Finally, I met with my doctor and managed to get more specifics -- 24 sessions are treating my clavicle area (as they can't operate here) and the breast, and the last 6 are just the breast.  So I am thinking of doing another 4 and then being done with this, stopping at 24 total instead of 30.