Funny: my bathroom shenanigans

While in our beautiful alternative universe of Providence, RI , we went to some famous local Chinese buffet restaurant for a feast. My motto lately -- eat as much as I can, because after the next chemo I might not be able to.

As I am so new to these cancer treatments and side effects, of course I was in my regular easy traveling garb -- jeans and sweatshirt -- and thought nothing of it. 

At some point I needed to use the bathroom and boy, was I in for a rude awakening. Because of the arthritis pains, all of a sudden buttons and zippers felt like they required the dexterity of a contortionist. With my inability to bend my fingers, it turned out I couldn't unbutton or even unzip my pants, nor dial the phone to quietly call George for help.  

So here was the scene: I opened the door and semi-quietly, if there is such a term, called for George. Then we spent a long time locked in the bathroom with some noises and discussion on how to get me first out of, and then back into, my pants. Alas, probably 10 minutes later when we left the bathroom most of the restaurant stuff was along the wall whispering in Chinese... 

We decided not to disabuse them of whatever funny notions they fantasized about regarding our bathroom escapades. Who knows, maybe we were the talk of the town now, so I'll just chalk it up as a win for the day. But note to self: next time, wear pants that you can actually take off by yourself.

The funny

For several weeks I have been in and out of the hospitals for different tests almost daily, and getting in and out of hospital gowns in a few minutes became so routine. 

I walked in for bone scan, and the guy in a white robe between small talk asked me to take off my coat...and I automatically proceeded to undress and took off my shirt as well. He paused, smiled and said that he is all for it, but he was here now just to pump radioactive stuff into my veins :)

And this is even before the anticipated brain fog from chemotherapy!